WHAT KIND OF CUSTOMER ARE YOU?
There’s a fool born every minute, and two to take him.
~Author Unknown, but credited to someone at
Dewey, Cheatem & Howe
Dashing around today, I ducked into the PathMark grocery on the waaay up upper east side to get something for dinner, and the display case right inside the door caught my eye. Looking to see exactly what was in those ‘BBQ Flavored Wings’, but I didn’t get past the description:
BONELESS CHICKEN WINGS
Wow. If they can bone a chicken wing and serve it intact, that would be a first! This wasn’t an ancient Chinese chef linked to five generations of culinary artists who could actually do such things. This was a grocery store! Upon closer inspection, they were revealed as ordinary chicken wings with the bones still tucked inside. Who did they think they’re kidding?
I guess I’m a stickler for truth in advertising, packaging and other ‘ing’s, but it really made me wonder just how stupid corporate America believes their customers to be. I recall a mattress salesman in Manhattan who, when asked why their bedding was so high (really, you need a step stool to get into some beds being sold today) he mumbled something about buildings in NYC being so very tall. Are you kidding me?
But as I write this, I think perhaps that isn’t what’s going on at the PathMark.
Maybe the company doesn’t think their customers stupid; maybe it is the corporation who possesses this quality. It is certainly possible that some hapless shmoo made the mistake in labeling, a corporate conspiracy of dunces rather than one foisted upon dunces. After all, it’s not as though anyone capable of eating a chicken wing won’t instantly realize that they are not boneless at all, and thereby think a little less of the purveyor who sold them as such.
DON’T JUST WING IT
I wonder how many people will buy the wings, believing them to be actually boneless? Would you be so quick to believe such a label? Or would you trust your brain — questioning the probability — and your eyes, peering closely into the package to see what was really going on?
You cannot believe everything you see on labels. The cereal aisle is a portal to a fantasy land of health claims that assault you and your children from all sides. Paying attention to detail is your shopping dividend. Serving sizes are not standardized and that’s why the Fruit Loops box says it has fewer calories per serving than the Raisin Bran box.
Treat it as a game. The next time you go grocery shopping, challenge your family to see how many packages they can find that have downright inaccuracies, or claim things that you just don’t believe. See who can get the most points and talk about the foods right there. Winner gets to decide what to make for dinner. It could be a fun investment in your family’s education that teaches the value of questioning what is represented in marketing by Big Food whose number one priority isn’t to enlighten their customer. What a great idea for a field trip!
And don’t get me started on unit pricing! Hint: each isn’t a fair unit of measure.
